THE DAY MY TOWN CHANGED FOREVER
The scars of the Omagh bombing went far beyond physical injury. Mary McAleer, who was just 13 when she was caught up in the horror, says it took 10 years for her psychological wounds to heal. This is her story
The day my town changed forever
MUM and dad were working that day but it was dad who left me in town. I met my friend Caitriona at the bus and we went into Route 66, the music shop.
When we came out, police were ushering people out of town - not in any panicked way, just moving people on. We asked a passer-by what was happening and she said there was a stupid bomb scare.
We were messing around, playing games. We now know we were even playing around the car carrying the bomb.
At 3.10pm the bomb exploded and my Omagh changed forever.
I was flung to the ground. The dust was everywhere.
I couldn't see anything. Time seemed to go slow.
Bricks began to fall beside me and I started to run. I could see the car in the air.
I got into an alleyway and what I saw will haunt me forever. I found Caitriona and hugged her. The bricks, glass and dust were falling everywhere and then I looked down and my heart stopped.
I saw a small boy, no more that six years old, lying dead in front of me. His trousers were around his ankles, blown off. He was on his own. I just looked at him. This image comes back to me again and again and I have felt guilt for years.
I could see a large group of men trying to push a car off a girl - their hands were burning and they were all screaming. They took their jackets off to help. I could see a grown man with a bald head crying with blood coming down his head.
We had cuts and were covered in dirt and shrapnel. Our clothes were ripped. A family friend, Ms Eccles, took us to dad. He hugged us both and put us in the car.
He tried to take us to hospital but it was crazy. He left my friend home to her parents.
She couldn't hear and neither of us could speak.
Both being nurses, mum and dad kicked into action. They both went straight to the hospital in answer to calls for help.
The next few days and weeks were a blur. Police came but I couldn't speak to them. I would wake at night screaming, running into my parents room crying. I was brought to the doctors many times due to my back being sore but after X-rays and tests it was put down to 'emotional pain'.
In my head this made me think everyone thought I was making the pain up. My parents got me to talk about what happened. I told them everything once.
After that I did not say a word about the bomb until I was 21 -I couldn't even say the word bomb. If anything came on the news it was turned over. If anyone asked I would scream and shout. I was offered counselling but wouldn't accept it.
I became very angry and would often cry about unrelated things. I didn't go into town on a Saturday for four years. Mum always said that after that I would always fold my arms when in town - I suppose that's body language for you.
On anniversaries I would never go into Omagh. I felt like I was losing control. At 15 I began having eating problems.
I went to university and studied social work. When we studied post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), I realised for the first time I could be a sufferer.
At the age of 21 I couldn't think of anything else but the bomb. I wasn't sleeping at night. I wasn't eating or talking to anyone.
Living in Belfast with my sister, one night I was extremely stressed and having constant flashbacks. I went to my sister's room and broke down. I told her everything.
She took me to the doctor and I was given medication to help with stress. I was also diagnosed with PTSD.
I found counselling extremely hard. Everything else in my life seemed to be on hold until I got through it.
After completing the counselling, for the first time I was able to say I was an Omagh bomb victim.
Psychology took me further through cognitive behavioural therapy and reliving.
I went with my mum to the alley where I was when the bomb exploded. It was a huge step but something I had to do. I understood my anger; it was because when no-one was caught for the bomb, I thought no-one cared. I am still angry that no-one was brought to justice for the murders.
I am now 23. I have a boyfriend called Stephen and a very close relationship with my family.
I still have the tape 1 bought at Route 66 on August 15 1998. I will listen to it some day.
The day my town changed forever
MUM and dad were working that day but it was dad who left me in town. I met my friend Caitriona at the bus and we went into Route 66, the music shop.
When we came out, police were ushering people out of town - not in any panicked way, just moving people on. We asked a passer-by what was happening and she said there was a stupid bomb scare.
We were messing around, playing games. We now know we were even playing around the car carrying the bomb.
At 3.10pm the bomb exploded and my Omagh changed forever.
I was flung to the ground. The dust was everywhere.
I couldn't see anything. Time seemed to go slow.
Bricks began to fall beside me and I started to run. I could see the car in the air.
I got into an alleyway and what I saw will haunt me forever. I found Caitriona and hugged her. The bricks, glass and dust were falling everywhere and then I looked down and my heart stopped.
I saw a small boy, no more that six years old, lying dead in front of me. His trousers were around his ankles, blown off. He was on his own. I just looked at him. This image comes back to me again and again and I have felt guilt for years.
I could see a large group of men trying to push a car off a girl - their hands were burning and they were all screaming. They took their jackets off to help. I could see a grown man with a bald head crying with blood coming down his head.
We had cuts and were covered in dirt and shrapnel. Our clothes were ripped. A family friend, Ms Eccles, took us to dad. He hugged us both and put us in the car.
He tried to take us to hospital but it was crazy. He left my friend home to her parents.
She couldn't hear and neither of us could speak.
Both being nurses, mum and dad kicked into action. They both went straight to the hospital in answer to calls for help.
The next few days and weeks were a blur. Police came but I couldn't speak to them. I would wake at night screaming, running into my parents room crying. I was brought to the doctors many times due to my back being sore but after X-rays and tests it was put down to 'emotional pain'.
In my head this made me think everyone thought I was making the pain up. My parents got me to talk about what happened. I told them everything once.
After that I did not say a word about the bomb until I was 21 -I couldn't even say the word bomb. If anything came on the news it was turned over. If anyone asked I would scream and shout. I was offered counselling but wouldn't accept it.
I became very angry and would often cry about unrelated things. I didn't go into town on a Saturday for four years. Mum always said that after that I would always fold my arms when in town - I suppose that's body language for you.
On anniversaries I would never go into Omagh. I felt like I was losing control. At 15 I began having eating problems.
I went to university and studied social work. When we studied post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), I realised for the first time I could be a sufferer.
At the age of 21 I couldn't think of anything else but the bomb. I wasn't sleeping at night. I wasn't eating or talking to anyone.
Living in Belfast with my sister, one night I was extremely stressed and having constant flashbacks. I went to my sister's room and broke down. I told her everything.
She took me to the doctor and I was given medication to help with stress. I was also diagnosed with PTSD.
I found counselling extremely hard. Everything else in my life seemed to be on hold until I got through it.
After completing the counselling, for the first time I was able to say I was an Omagh bomb victim.
Psychology took me further through cognitive behavioural therapy and reliving.
I went with my mum to the alley where I was when the bomb exploded. It was a huge step but something I had to do. I understood my anger; it was because when no-one was caught for the bomb, I thought no-one cared. I am still angry that no-one was brought to justice for the murders.
I am now 23. I have a boyfriend called Stephen and a very close relationship with my family.
I still have the tape 1 bought at Route 66 on August 15 1998. I will listen to it some day.
Further Information
Publisher: THE IRISH NEWS
Ref: IN10An/05
Published Date: 06-Aug-08
Related Images
