SURVIVORS GROUP SET UP TO EASE PAIN OF GRIEF
Survivors' group set up to ease pain of grief
"WE'RE all to blame for Omagh," said a man in the crowd at one of Saturday's remembrance ceremonies.
"Maybe it's what we said or didn't say," he went on, "or maybe it's what we did or didn't do.
"But we're all to blame for the last 30 years and we're all responsible for Omagh."
As the police hunt for the killers continues, logic would dictate that the only people responsible for the Omagh outrage are the people who planted the bomb.
However, it's hard to avoid the sneakiest of suspicions that sometime, even one time, each of as could have said something differently, done something better or spoken up when it was easier to keep quiet.
For those closes to the tragedy, that sense of guilt and helplessness is a thousand times deeper.
'Why did my son die, why not me - I've had my life' wailed one grief-stricken father.
"I'm supposed to protect life, but I moved all those people to their deaths." said a young policeman, still pro-foundly shocked.
"We had to put a dead woman on the floor." said a nurse, biting her lip. "it went against everything I believe in, all my training.'
It will take Omagh generations to recover from the atrocity.
The bereaved and maimed face life sentences of grieving and medical treatment. Many will never fully get over the harrowing scenes they witnessed.
But according to consultant clinical psychologist Dr Nichola Rooney. feelings of guilt have to be tackled early and effectively.
"Survivors" guilt is a common phenomena," she said. "When something like this occurs, it touches the vulnerability in all of us and forces us to re-evaluate our values in life.
Survivors' guilt is especially strong due to feelings of helplessness... most people who lose a child will contemplate their own life and ask why they go on living.
"Police and medical staff will be haunted by what they saw, but they were at least involved in doing something and will know they did their best." Dr Rooney continued.
"They are professionals and will have felt more in control and consequently they will ultimately deal better with their trauma.
"Children, on the other hand, don't have the capacity to understand that death is forever. As they grow older they will also understand what they've missed out on in the past.
"Young children can also feel that they are responsible, because they thought or said or did something 'bad'."
Dr Rooney said it is still early days for the people of Omagh and that long-term professional support - for months and years - will be necessary to heal the wounds.
"Guilt is perfectly natural, but needs to be dealt with early and effectively. Guilt is futile because you can't "undo" it and it is an aspect of grief and surviving people really need to work on."
The sheer scale of the Omagh tragedy complicates the recovery process. As businesses re-opened today, ordinary life is slowly returning - but with the whole community rocked, there is no escape, no relief, from the emotional fall-out.
A group is being formed in the town this week for survivors to share their experiences and talk out the trauma.
WAVE, which works with those bereaved or traumatised in the Troubles, will be one of the participating organisations.
Counsellor Myrtle Hamilton, whose husband Thomas was killed in tit-for-tat murders in 1974. has been talking to people in Omagh.
She said: "There are a lot of feelings of guilt - they feel guilty because they were so helpless or that they walked away without a physical scratch...
"Extra feelings of guilt arise from people feeling that, thank God, it wasn't me or mine. They feel cruel and selfish. But people have to be told over and over that it's okay to feel like that. It's a normal, human reaction."
For further information about WAVE, contact the WAVE Trauma Centre, 523 Antrim Road. Belfast. BT15 3BS (Tel 01232 779922) or 9 Dobbin Street, Armagh, BT61 7QQ (Tel 01861 511199).
"WE'RE all to blame for Omagh," said a man in the crowd at one of Saturday's remembrance ceremonies.
"Maybe it's what we said or didn't say," he went on, "or maybe it's what we did or didn't do.
"But we're all to blame for the last 30 years and we're all responsible for Omagh."
As the police hunt for the killers continues, logic would dictate that the only people responsible for the Omagh outrage are the people who planted the bomb.
However, it's hard to avoid the sneakiest of suspicions that sometime, even one time, each of as could have said something differently, done something better or spoken up when it was easier to keep quiet.
For those closes to the tragedy, that sense of guilt and helplessness is a thousand times deeper.
'Why did my son die, why not me - I've had my life' wailed one grief-stricken father.
"I'm supposed to protect life, but I moved all those people to their deaths." said a young policeman, still pro-foundly shocked.
"We had to put a dead woman on the floor." said a nurse, biting her lip. "it went against everything I believe in, all my training.'
It will take Omagh generations to recover from the atrocity.
The bereaved and maimed face life sentences of grieving and medical treatment. Many will never fully get over the harrowing scenes they witnessed.
But according to consultant clinical psychologist Dr Nichola Rooney. feelings of guilt have to be tackled early and effectively.
"Survivors" guilt is a common phenomena," she said. "When something like this occurs, it touches the vulnerability in all of us and forces us to re-evaluate our values in life.
Survivors' guilt is especially strong due to feelings of helplessness... most people who lose a child will contemplate their own life and ask why they go on living.
"Police and medical staff will be haunted by what they saw, but they were at least involved in doing something and will know they did their best." Dr Rooney continued.
"They are professionals and will have felt more in control and consequently they will ultimately deal better with their trauma.
"Children, on the other hand, don't have the capacity to understand that death is forever. As they grow older they will also understand what they've missed out on in the past.
"Young children can also feel that they are responsible, because they thought or said or did something 'bad'."
Dr Rooney said it is still early days for the people of Omagh and that long-term professional support - for months and years - will be necessary to heal the wounds.
"Guilt is perfectly natural, but needs to be dealt with early and effectively. Guilt is futile because you can't "undo" it and it is an aspect of grief and surviving people really need to work on."
The sheer scale of the Omagh tragedy complicates the recovery process. As businesses re-opened today, ordinary life is slowly returning - but with the whole community rocked, there is no escape, no relief, from the emotional fall-out.
A group is being formed in the town this week for survivors to share their experiences and talk out the trauma.
WAVE, which works with those bereaved or traumatised in the Troubles, will be one of the participating organisations.
Counsellor Myrtle Hamilton, whose husband Thomas was killed in tit-for-tat murders in 1974. has been talking to people in Omagh.
She said: "There are a lot of feelings of guilt - they feel guilty because they were so helpless or that they walked away without a physical scratch...
"Extra feelings of guilt arise from people feeling that, thank God, it wasn't me or mine. They feel cruel and selfish. But people have to be told over and over that it's okay to feel like that. It's a normal, human reaction."
For further information about WAVE, contact the WAVE Trauma Centre, 523 Antrim Road. Belfast. BT15 3BS (Tel 01232 779922) or 9 Dobbin Street, Armagh, BT61 7QQ (Tel 01861 511199).
Further Information
Publisher: BELFAST TELEGRAPH
Ref: BT/0263
Published Date: 25-Aug-98
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